First of all let me start off by saying I loved Lightning Fit, and despite what you might think as you read this, I can’t wait to go back!
I’m not sure what’s happened but I’ve become a person that works out, I sneak out of the house before the kids wake up, walking through the Orangetheory doors at the crack of dawn, so when my friend told me about this place I thought “sure, why not.”
I get there after a crazy day running errands, asking if there’s a place to change into my workout clothes, “of course,” the lady at the front tells me, “we actually have clothes for you to wear, just remove all your underwear and jewelry.” Um,ok.
As I change into something resembling long underwear I’m feeling ok, but the follow up questions “do you have implants, pace maker, or metal rods in your body?” leave me a bit unsettled.
As I walk out of the office, waivers signed I notice my trainer, she’s so nice and helpful it almost distracts me from the soaking wet outfit she helping me into, that’s best described as a combination of a bullet proof vest and a straight jacket.
“Should I be able to breathe?” I ask as she tightens the straps.
“It needs to be tight,” she replies.
Got it. No breathing.
As I step into the room, I’m a bit confused, but she quickly explains how we’ll do different exercises, and how the electricity will (okay, I can’t remember, I was too concerned about the electricity and the lack of oxygen I was trying not to panic.)
What the fuck just happened.
Zap. Zap. Zap.
I scream again.
“Too much?” She ask.
“I don’t know,” I answer “how much is one supposed to be electrocuted.
As flashbacks of my childhood come back to me, my older cousin telling me to touch an old light socket, I go through a series of all body movements, by this point I’m used to the “zaps” and laughing instead of screaming. Despite the easy movements and low weights I’m sweating and out of breath. “Is it normal to be out of breath,” I ask “or am I having a heart attack.”
“Totally normal, that’s the whole point of this, a quick, intense workout.”
“Ok, cool,” I think, I’m not dying.
At the end of the workout, I lay down as they release lactic acid, tiny full body zaps that sorta resemble a seizure.
“So this was cool,” I say.
“So glad you liked it! You’ll be sore later so drink a ton of water.”
“How sore? I still have to go home and parent 7 kids, many of whom require lifting and carrying.”
She laughs. Crap.
Currently I’m in bed, I’ve been here since 6 last night, I couldn’t move, everything hurt, but in that oh so good way, I told Sean he has to try it, it’s only twice a week for 25 minutes.
I already booked my next session.